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You ever feel like you missed a really important meeting?
That’s how perimenopause hit me.
One day I was juggling work, training, a pretty consistent routine, and the usual ups and downs of life—and the next, it was like someone changed the settings on my entire operating system. Energy? Up and down. Recovery? Slower. Emotions? Wildly unpredictable. Sleep? Inconsistent. Joints? Loud. Metabolism? Ghosted me.
At first, I thought I just needed more rest or a new training plan. Then I thought maybe I was burned out. Maybe a little depressed. Maybe eating the wrong thing. Maybe not stretching enough. Maybe just… aging?
Turns out, it was all of the above—and also not quite any of it.
It was perimenopause.
And here’s the kicker: no one tells you how sneaky this transition can be. Many of us think of menopause as one big, dramatic moment—hot flashes, period stops, boom, done. But the truth is, it’s a slow, unpredictable process that often starts in your late 30s or early 40s. And it’s not just about reproduction—it’s about how hormones affect every system in the body: energy, cognition, digestion, temperature regulation, bone density, sleep, muscle mass, motivation, moods, and more.
In all honesty I had already been preparing, and knew quite a bit more than many women at the time; but it still wasn’t enough. I realize now I was already behind when I thought I was on top or ahead of it. Sort of funny since that’s also how perimenopause makes you feel anyway. Always trying to catch up.
If you’re a guy reading this and thinking, “Cool… not my lane,” hang in there. You probably know and love someone navigating this, whether it’s a partner, friend, colleague, client, or family member. The more we all understand what’s actually happening during this transition, the more we can support each other—and ourselves—better. No more separating genders in Health class to learn about ourselves.
As a coach, massage therapist, and athlete, I couldn’t ignore the way this chapter of life was affecting me and the people I work with. The same recovery tools and training structures that used to work… didn’t. Clients who were once thriving with a certain workout style suddenly found themselves exhausted, moody, or injured.
That’s why I started coaching specifically for this era of life. Not just to help women “get through” to and beyond menopause, but to help them thrive—with better understanding, smarter movement, and more self-compassion. And for my own self love to help me through too!
We talk a lot in fitness and wellness circles about how to push harder, go faster, get leaner. But in midlife? Sometimes the goal is to listen more closely. To adapt. To recover better. To shift our goals. To find joy and purpose in movement that supports our bodies instead of punishing them for changing.
And thankfully, I’m not doing this work alone.
I am blessed to have a wonderful officemate in my massage therapy clinic. Enter Attune Menopause Care. This incredible practice, founded by Margaret Ladner, is located right in my office space. Margaret and her teammate Kiyomi are Certified Nurse-Midwives who have specialize in providing care during menopause and perimenopause. They know this is not just ‘oh everyone goes through this, its part of aging’. They provide personalized, evidence-based care throughout the menopause transition and beyond. Their approach is patient-centered, compassionate, and focused on treating the whole person. They are not there to throw a prescription at you and send you out the door—they listens, collaborates, and helps create sustainable lifestyle changes to improve quality of life.
In her words: “My approach is patient-centered and emphasizes evidence-based care and informed decision-making. I strive to treat the whole person with a view to improve quality of life and promote lifestyle changes to benefit health for years to come.”
Having her (Margaret and now Kiyomi) as partners in my space has been a game changer. It has added to what I feel I was seeking even before meeting Margaret initially. I have been trying to build a community of comfort, guidance, and support. Through life, training, and everything else!
In my coaching practice, that might look like helping someone modify a triathlon training plan to account for hormonal fluctuations. Or maybe it’s working with a woman who feels like she’s losing herself—her drive, her body, her motivation—and guiding her back toward a sense of ownership over her life and goals. It might be adapting strength workouts for joint pain, reworking schedules for better sleep, or simply giving someone the tools to name what’s happening and know they’re not alone.
It may even just be navigating life and stepping away from the training (or a client that is not an athlete), and helping them make sense and find themselves again. Life transitions are tough! And then add to all the other obstacles during this point of our lives.
And on a personal note? I’ve had to walk this road myself.
I’m no longer sure I’ll do another marathon. A long-course triathlon? Meh. I try not to think about all of that right now. Hope is there, but first things first; so it is set aside. That is ok! This doesn’t mean I’m done. I still have dreams. I still love movement. I still show up every day with curiosity, energy, and a little sarcasm. I’ve just learned to set different expectations. To be honest, some days I feel like I’ve turned a corner—not necessarily back to my old self, but forward into a wiser, stronger, more grounded version of me.
I’ve even taken up gardening. Yes. Gardening.
Some people call it a “granny hobby,” but let me tell you: it is not for the faint of heart. It’s bending, lifting, squatting, pulling, lunging, and sweating. It’s strength training, mindfulness, and therapy all in one. I put in my earbuds and zone out for hours—sometimes realizing I never even turned the music on. That’s the kind of peace I’m chasing these days.
I created a continuing education class for licensed massage therapists that focuses on what we don’t learn in school about this phase of life—and how we can support clients better through it. I’m adapting that class for the general public too, because let’s be honest: we could all use a little more understanding around the physical, emotional, and mental shifts of midlife. So stay tuned to the adaptation, and more!
So here’s what I’ll leave you with:
If your training feels off… if your emotions feel unpredictable… if your body suddenly feels like an unfamiliar landscape… you are not broken. You are not alone. And you’re not too old or too late to pivot, reset, and rediscover what works for you now.
Midlife isn’t the end of anything. It’s just the middle. Messy, beautiful, strange, empowering, funny, uncomfortable… but rich with potential. And you don’t have to go it alone.
We’ve got support. We’ve got options. And we’ve got each other.
If you need me, I’ll be in the freezer aisle of my grocery store trying to regulate my body temperature and pretending I remember what I came in for.
Seriously though! Message me! I would love to hear from you! Help me build this community!
