Getting It Right – Bike Snob NYC

I can count of one hand the number of things I’ve gotten right in this lifetime, and one of them is this bike:

Astonishingly, I see there are still Roadinis available over at Old Man Petersen’s House of Ferrous Velocipedes and Canvas Curios, which suggests to me that people have warped priorities because in a sane world they’d have sold out quicker than…well, than I did when my first book came out:

Sure, this blog has been losing air ever since, and in fact you could make a pretty strong argument that it’s been rolling on a bare rim for years. But it was all worth it. I mean good grief I was riding a Scattante in those days for chrissakes!

That was of course the Scattante Empire State Courier. See, back in the early 21st century, everybody was trying to cash in on the urban cycling craze. Specialized had its city edition Langsters:

Felt had…this thing, complete with top tube pad and a convenient seat tube-mounted 15mm wrench so thieves could more easily steal your wheels:

And Performance had its own line of themed singlespeeds, including the Empire State Courier, complete with copy that referenced my then-popular blog:

I suppose it would have been nice if they’d asked me first, but they did send me a bike, which in a way was even more insulting, like someone punching you in the nose and then tossing you a Kleenex. However, I did end up making good use of the bike, using it for cultural research purposes:

And to test then-popular items such as Knog lights (a.k.a. “Hipster Cysts”):

And the then-new Hold Fast straps, which were basically Power Grips but made out of Velcro:

And eventually it just became the bike I rode everywhere, until I had to clean out my Brooklyn storage unit and donated what was left of it to Recycle-A-Bicycle.

Anyway, while I may not have a soul or a popular blog any longer, I do have much nicer bicycles now. But why do I really need both a Roadini and a Homer?

BECAUSE I PAID MY DUES, DAMN IT! Because I was riding a goddamn Scattante around New York back when Rapha was still sophisticated, brakes were for “woosies,” and gravel was just something that got stuck in your shoe! To wit:

I’ve had these shoes since early 2024, and if you’re looking for a walkable recessed-cleat shoe they may be the best deal on the face of the Earth:

Of course for the ultimate in versatility and walkability nothing beats a sneaker, but sometimes I just wanna clip in.

Some people say you only need one bike, others say you need at least three, while still others push that whole “n+1” thing. Whatever. As far as I’m concerned, you should have exactly as many bikes as you have pairs of shoes.